Youth Workin' It

Consultancy and Resources for Youth Workers and Organizations Worldwide

Hard-Hitting Video For Discussing Difficult Issues With Youth

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Discussing Difficult Issues With YouthPhysical abuse. Pregnancy. Suicide. Death.

These are all issues that can be difficult to address with young people. Most youth will have been impacted by at least one of these issues, either directly or by their friends or family being affected by them.

This session idea touches on all of these areas in a fairly non-threatening way. This will therefore hopefully enable your young people to consider and discuss the issues, without putting any of them in too much of an uncomfortable position. Be sensitive to their feelings though, particularly if you’re aware that some of them have gone through any of these situations.

You can then use their answers to gauge where they’re at and if it’s worth planning any future sessions based on the issues raised.

Watch

First of all, watch the Zack Hemsey music video below for his song Waiting Between Worlds.

Discussion

Next, discuss the situations faced by the people in the video. You could come up with your own questions, but here are some conversation starters:

Pregnant Girl

  • In the first scene, you find out the girl gets beaten up by her boyfriend and then discovers that she’s pregnant. What do you think is going through her head as she sits in the bathroom?
  • If she was your friend, what would you suggest she do?
  • Do you feel like she made the right decision leaving the boyfriend? Why?
  • At the end of the video, the boyfriend sees the positive pregnancy test. What do you think he’s thinking and feeling at that moment?
  • How could she have avoided being in this situation in the first place?

Old Man On Beach

  • What do you think he’s thinking about as he’s sitting on the beach?
  • What do you think he’s feeling?
  • Why do you think he decides to try committing suicide?
  • Towards the end of the video, you see him laying on the beach having survived the suicide attempt. What do you think he’s feeling at that point?
  • Do you think he still has anything to live for?

Mother Of Son Who’s Been Shot

  • What do you think would have been going through the Mom’s mind when she heard her son had been shot?
  • Do you think she wishes she’d done anything differently?
  • The doctor advises that her son can either live in a vegetative state, or they can turn off the machines that are keeping him alive. What do you think you’d choose if you were in her position? Why is that?
  • Do you ever do anything that makes your parents fear that something similar will happen to you?
  • If so, how do you think this makes them feel? Does this make their reactions seem more proportionate?

Question: What other questions would you ask based on the content in the video? Let us know in the comments below.

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How To Put In Place A Child Protection System For Your Organization

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Child protection system
Put in place a proper child protection system with appropriate boundaries

It’s always been important to have a child protection system put in place at your organization, whether you’re a youth worker in a church, school, non-profit or anywhere else.

This has taken on even more importance recently, following the high profile cases of Jerry Sandusky in the US and Jimmy Savile in the UK.

This week’s Best Of Youth Workin’ It therefore looks at ways that you can put in place a child protection system for the safety of your young people, as well as for the protection of yourself and your volunteers.

1. Adult To Youth Ratios – One of the basics of child protection is ensuring that you have adequate ratios of volunteers to young people. This post looks at what kind of ratios are best practice and provides three reasons why this is so important.

2. 4 Steps You Can Take To Promote Child Protection – This post has four important steps that you can put in place to make sure that the youth in your care are kept safe.

3. How To Handle Disclosures Of Abuse – Dealing with something as serious as child abuse can catch you off guard, so it’s vital to know in advance how to handle disclosures of this kind. This post looks at how to handle this situation, whether the abuse is alleged against one of your volunteers or someone completely unconnected with your youth programs (e.g. parents).

4. What Should I Do With A Volunteer Who Had A Relationship With A Young Person – Carrying on from the previous post, this gives more specific advice on how to deal with volunteers that have an inappropriate relationship with a young person.

5. You Gave Your Teens What?! – This was one of the earliest posts on the Youth Workin’ It blog and looks at one way of ensuring that you maintain appropriate boundaries with your youth.

6. Stop Giving Youth TMI – This post also looks at how to have appropriate boundaries with young people, particularly in this new era of social media where it’s easier than ever for lines to get blurred between professional and personal relationships.

Question: What tips do you have for putting in place a child protection system for your organization? We’d love to hear your advice in the comments below.

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What Are The Implications For At Risk Youth?

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What are the implications for at risk youthQ: OK, so I work with at risk youth. What implications does this have and how should I deal with it?

A: Working with at risk youth will often have implications that aren’t always immediately obvious, but are important to bear in mind. For example:

  • Youth living in foster care or group homes – They will often have a hard time trusting people and forming close relationships, especially if they’ve moved homes numerous times. This can often lead to problems at school as they’ve had to change schools multiple times, meaning they fall behind on learning and don’t get to build lasting relationships with school friends
  • Abused youth – If you’re a youth pastor or volunteer youth worker in a church, young people who have been abused by their father may well have a hard time relating to God as a father
  • Youth from low-income families – They may have a hard time concentrating for no other reason than that they’re hungry. It might also mean they’re bullied due to not having nice clothing
  • Youth with learning difficulties – If your programs involve a lot of sitting around and reading, there’s a far higher likelihood that they will be disruptive. This isn’t because they’re naughty, but because they’re unable to fully participate. Try to be sensitive to this and take into account different learning styles
  • Youth with physical disabilities – Try to include games and activities that they can participate in, rather than them having to sit out while everyone else has fun

It’s therefore important to also know your organization’s policy on how to handle disclosures of abuse and steps you can take to promote child protection.

What are the longer term implications?

  • Sexually Transmitted Infections – Young people with high sexual activity are more susceptible to STIs
  • Unemployment – Youth who are at risk will often struggle at school for all manner of reasons. This can in turn lead to them finding it hard to get a job due to a lack of qualifications
  • Crime – If they’re unable to make a living, they may turn to crime to gain an income
  • Relationships – If a young person has had troubled relationships with their family – or no relationships at all if moving from foster home to foster home – it’s likely they’ll have trouble forming longer term relationships
  • Sexuality – LGBT youth are more likely to end up homeless than heterosexual young people and subsequently encounter further risks as a result of being homeless

Needless to say, we think it’s important to be aware of at risk youth and be sensitive to their needs. However, it’s also important to remember that just because they’re at risk, it doesn’t mean that there’s no hope for them. Therefore, be wary of labelling young people as this can result in a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Question: What other implications are there for at risk youth? Please share your ideas in the comments below.

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What Does “At Risk Youth” Mean?

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What does at risk youth meanQ: I’ve heard this term used about quite a lot of young people, but what does “at risk youth” mean?

A: At its most basic, it means youth who are at risk – surprising, huh?! But “at risk” of what?

There are many risk factors that can lead to hazards in young peoples’ lives:

  • Poverty
  • Abuse (physical, sexual, mental, etc)
  • Crime
  • Poor schools
  • Living in foster care, group homes, etc
  • Bullying
  • Disabilities
  • Unstable home life
  • Learning difficulties
  • Drugs
  • Alcohol
  • Mental health
  • Sexuality

In short, this could mean that pretty much all youth are – to some extent – at risk. Like risk assessments though, some young people will be in a far higher risk situation than others.

How are youth identified as being at risk?

All youth in their lives have both risk factors (such as those listed above) and protective factors. Having a higher number of risk factors and lower number of protective factors in their life are good indicators of whether they should be deemed an “at risk youth”.

Protective factors can include:

  • Stable home life
  • Encouraging parents
  • Scholastic ability
  • Good teachers
  • Safe neighborhood
  • Learning social skills
  • Being taught life skills
  • Healthy lifestyle
  • Good diet
  • Access to services

How can we tell if they’re at risk?

As youth workers, we should try to be aware of any youth in our programs who are at risk. Sometimes these young people will be easy to identify, particularly if you work with a group that are generally regarded as being in a higher risk situation, such as foster youth, young offenders or students in low-income areas.

It can therefore sometimes be harder for youth workers like youth pastors to know which of their young people are at risk. There are some signs though that could indicate that youth are in more hazardous living situations:

  • Highly sexualized behavior – Might indicate sexual abuse
  • Wearing same clothes / clothes don’t fit / clothes have holes – Might be living in poverty
  • Unwilling to read anything out – Might have learning difficulties (although could just be shyness)
  • Extremely aggressive – Might indicate abuse of some kind
  • Wears clothing that covers body, even in hot weather – Might suffer from physical abuse and so trying to cover bruises. This can also be a sign that they self-harm (covering up cuts/burns) or that they suffer from sexual abuse (don’t want to draw attention to their body)

Next week, we’ll look at some of the implications of working with at risk youth.

Question: Do you work with at risk youth? What advice would you give to other youth workers on how to deal with these situations? Please share your advice in the comments below.

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How To Handle Disclosures Of Abuse

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Youth work disclosure of abuseQ: What should I do if a youth tells me they’ve been abused?

A: You may find yourself in a situation where the rules you and your organization have about confidentiality may no longer apply. When a youth discloses about abuse to you, you have an obligation (both legal and moral in my opinion) to tell someone about what happened.

As a youth worker, or youth work volunteer, it’s your role to advocate for the youth in your care and give them the best possible chance in their lives. This includes keeping them safe.

One of the best things you can do is to know your organization’s guidelines, policies and procedures on how to handle disclosures of abuse. If your organization doesn’t have those in place, this is your first opportunity for advocacy. It will help provide support for you, your volunteers and the youth you work with.

When a disclosure happens – or is about to – remember the following:

  1. Remind the youth that you will have to tell someone. If they’re asking you to keep a secret, you need to remember your professional boundaries and prepare the youth that you may need to tell someone about what you’re told. This is not to discourage them from sharing but it will help your relationship with them, as they will (hopefully) not feel betrayed when you tell the appropriate members of staff and/or law enforcement about the disclosure.
  2. Do not look shocked. No matter what any youth tells you, do not look shocked, nervous, upset or angry. These may be involuntary body language reactions to the allegations of abuse you might be hearing, but you need to work hard to keep your composure. By reacting, you may project feelings of disapproval onto the youth, instead of about the incident, leaving the youth that is disclosing with feelings of shame. You also might inadvertently stop the disclosure as the youth feels uncomfortable talking any more.
  3. Remember details without taking notes. Do your best to absorb as much information during a disclosure as possible without sitting there writing down notes. While it may seem like an important step to ensure you get all the details correct, you may stop the disclosure which is the last thing you want. It may have taken years for a youth to build up the courage to share about their abuse; by stopping them to grab a paper and pen, you might cause them to rethink their decision. Listen carefully and at your first opportunity make notes about the incident.
  4. Do not ask leading questions. Encourage the youth to share information without asking leading questions that may hinder any further legal action. ‘Can you tell me about what happened?’ is a better question than ‘Did they do ‘x’ to you?’ Just let them share their story.
  5. Do not decide if what you have heard is abuse or not. Your role in a disclosure is to report. Allow the police or other law enforcement officials to determine if actual abuse took place. Take your youth seriously, do not rely on past patterns of distrustful behavior, and follow your organization’s policies and procedures about what to do in the case of abuse disclosure.
  6. Be prepared to advocate for your youth, even if your organization will not. As a mandatory reporter, it’s your role to move up the ranks in your organization to ensure the proper steps are taken to report and end the abuse. If you believe abuse happened and the management or administration at your organization do not do anything with that information, you then have the responsibility to go to law enforcement officials yourself.
Abuse of a youth, or their friends or family or by a youth is a serious matter. Disclosing about abuse will be a painful process, but if handled correctly, you have the opportunity to make it a little bit easier

Question: What advice would you give about how to handle abuse disclosures by youth? Please share your thoughts on best practice in the comments below.

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